Gavin says a lot:

When I look into your sad brown eyes, they whisper,
love's been and gone...
it's the end of the line, we're wasting our time
I kiss you goodbye, now I can't believe I ever said that
I would die for you, your eyes do more than kill...
I want to live.

All's forgiven, so all's forgotten, I'm empty inside,
What I'm trying to say since you went away, I live a lie.
I drink all day I'm never sober just to ease the pain,
These lies do more than kill...

I want to live...
I want to live...

Like a ghost in my head you keep haunting me
Every promise we made, every word you said
I can't live without you!
Baby baby, when lovin' we were hiding
when lying we were brave.
Baby baby, I can't live without you
all I need is you.
I want to live.

('I want to live' - Gavin Friday)

Maria says it all:

I wish you never even loved me
It makes it so hard to live without love now
I know you’re often thinking of me
Sometimes I feel you so close by
That it takes all my might to keep from trying to track you down

I can surely keep you out of sight
Forget about the way you look,
your smile, the way you speak
But I’ve heard in the dead of night
outside my window silence breaking
With the solid destination of your lonesome speed

I know the sound of your Wheels
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know the sound of your Wheels
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know the sound of your Wheels

I had a handle on my sorrow
My composure was in order
if not sufficiently intact
But every reminiscent echo
brings a blow to chill my senses
And my heart quakes and tenses
‘til those moments pass

I know the sound of your Wheels
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know the sound of your Wheels
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know the sound of your Wheels

Ev’ry trace, ev’ry vision
Brings my emotions to collision
Past love’s lost tokens
Ev’ry cherished thought once spoken
False hope of reconciliation

('Wheels' - Lone Justice)

Uncle Piet

I hardly ever read the obituaries. Last Thursday I did, and there was his name: Piet Ruigrok-van de Werven. In a second I was back in my childhood.
Uncle Piet and his wife An (aunty An) lived a few doors from our house, somewhere in the outskirts of Haarlem. They owned a typical Dutch snack bar: a greasy, wooden trailer where you go to buy a unhealthy portion of fries drowning in mayonnaise. For us kids that and the little candy shop across the street of where our school was were the magnetic spots in our neighborhood.
So off course I was proud to live in the same street as uncle Piet and aunt An. As a little kid their daughters would baby sit me and my brothers and sister, but that is a whole different story.

Piet began his business in the fifties, with a mobile snack bar, as you can see in the picture. He settled somewhere round 1974 I think, at the Belgiëlaan. I remember there was a big party to celebrate 5 years of “Friet van Piet” (Piet’s Fries). We kids got free fries and soda and then we were taken to the movies. And everyone of us wore his blue “Friet van Piet – 5 years”-cap, with pride!
Over the years Piet had his difficulties with the health inspection, I reckon. There was even this saying in Haarlem: ‘Eet friet van Piet en je haalt de 65 niet’ (eat Piet’s fries and don’t reach 65). Well, Piet himself died at the age of 81.

And I'm back!

For those who didn't already know: I'm back in Haarlem (double A). I had a very good time in New York, Harlem (single A), with a lot of thanx to Gg.
I didn't do too much, but it as great to be there. NY is for some reason always kind to me.
It was fun doing my weblog for the paper (www.teruginnewyork.blogspot.com), it was great to see Roger again, it was nice to walk the streets of Manhattan (although I got blisters...), it was cool to see Lach again and see how Megan Reilly was doing. I met Art Spiegelman, that was cool. And it was very special to have my birthday dinner with Gg at Tanti Baci, and I cherish the late lunch we had in a great restaurant on 2nd street, right after I met Gg's friend James De La Vega (photo) - a great artist and very special person.
It was good to be away. I needed that. And NYC was the best place to go.

thank u, Gg