Doing something

“Think about you!” That was the message J.O. gave me. “Go do something!'' I knew he was right, but I couldn’t think of anything that I really wanted to do. Besides, I’m the kind of guy that considers it as some sort of betrayal to set aside this whole ‘L-issue’ just because it would be better for ‘me’. It doesn’t feel right to let go, despite the hurting.
Who taught me this? I don’t know. Maybe I just saw too many of the wrong movies when I was a kid. I was 8 and had a crush on Olivia Newton-John as Sandy. And she sang: 'My heart is saying "Don't let go!" Hold on to the end, that's what I intend to do...', didn't she? So how was and am I to know?

Anyway... I don’t think that I would have come up with any idea on what to do with my Sunday. So luckily there was M. She asked me to join her and two friends on a picnic in the park in Utrecht.
No, I didn’t feel like going. Not at all. But on the other hand I knew that I very much wanted to feel like going. So I went. I went ‘doing something’.
And I’m glad I went. It was good to see M and her friend My-K again. We had great food and nice wine. We talked, made fun, tried to solve a cryptic crossword and had the company of two very silly ducks. I felt free to make a few funny remarks, and it felt good to see it made them laugh. It was very a good day. (I’m sorry, L...)